OP-ED: My Tale of Complete COVID-19 Devastation of the Simcha Industry

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Backyard wedding takes place due to Covid19 Shutdowns | Yosef Shidler, a native of Denver, Colorado

TOM’S RIVER (VINnews) —  The following editorial has been written and prepared by Yosef Shidler of CJ Studios:

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I am starting to lose it. On a very serious note.

Like hundreds in the Jewish community, my sole income revolves on the Jewish simcha market. Something that is pretty much squashed at this point.  As a  photographer, our business and personal income rely heavily on the heavy wedding seasons to stay afloat. While accountants base their seasons around that April 15th deadline, Jewish Weddings revolve around the Jewish calendar cycle.

Every year we lose almost half the dates to Jewish Holidays and dates that weddings are not allowed. This year with Sefirah in May, July and the 3 weeks, my work calendar like many has limited dates regardless of any COVID rules.

The Yom Tovim this year will be the Majority of September. This leaves a part of May, June, and August for the potential to hold some income. That’s without any Corona problems. Essentially with sefirah about to start, we have about two and a half months’ worth of time to make an income which is supposed to sustain us through at least October of this year.

Did I mention we had a disastrous pre-Pesach season, watching the wedding world being shut down by the police left and right? Then add the cost of making Pesach for a family. No luxury resorts. I could never afford that.

This holds true for hundreds in the industry, photographers, videographers makeup artists, musicians, singers, hall owners, chefs, and bridal attendants. The list is long.

Well, you always have the summer right? It’s bound to be a great season.

Ya mean – June? The month that I usually get to pay off my credit card debts from the whole year and have a little extra cash. The one where we usually have not one empty date on the calendar (B”H). Oh, ye that one – It’s gone. Not happening.

People are not booking weddings. Our calendar sits mostly empty, at a point it would otherwise be full. The people that are booking or already booked are not booking big weddings. They cant and they can’t. Particular because they are not legal at the present. People are planning small backyard events. Social distancing wedding. That’s also assuming they will even be legal. As of now, they are not. One photographer for a few hours is the request of choice these days. No more fancy weddings. That’s a thing of the past for now.

This situation puts thousands in the simcha market out of work. For who knows how long.

Currently, I need to fear the police and government to not chase after me with extreme fines and penalties in my attempt to make a few dollars to feed my family via underground weddings.

Yet, its these same government people who are telling me to stay home and help well be on the way. Good old Uncle Sam is going to send you money to survive. As of present, 30
plus days at home, I have yet to receive a penny. That didn’t stop American Express from asking me when I believe I will be able to offer them my next payment. I didn’t have the heart to let them know I was not a  prophet. At present I am profitless.

Just like myself, most people don’t have money to spend anymore. The shutdowns being lifted for wedding venues is months down the road (if in sight at all). As of today, Diblasio made it clear no large events will be taking place in the city this June. The ability to stay, even somewhat financially stable at this point is unnerving at best. I know I speak for the position of hundreds in my industry.

Of course, I have my Emunah. I know full well  Hashem is holding our hands and will eventually get us all through this; somehow. You can learn chovos halivovs and others and really strengthen your emunah. But all said It’s a very frightening spot to be in. Hashem brought us our amazing business and I have to believe he will get us through it.

I’m sure one day soon artscroll will be printing a book of Coronavirus miracles.

I am grateful to Hashem for the fact I am still alive and healthy. I am here with my family when others are left without a breadwinner. It’s an eerie prospect. I feel almost ungrateful writing my thoughts when you think about the devastation others have experienced and continue to experience.

We are lucky to be alive and healthy. I am lucky my family is likewise in the samespot. You keep saying thank you for every minute. Every time you turn on the Jewish media you see the Tehillim requests flood your WhatsApp and the calls for tzedaka for another widow with 11 children. Its heartbreaking. Its hurts all the more not to be in a position to drop money to help as I may have been able to do prior. Every day is another story. Unthinkable images of young children saying kaddish has become an all to familiar sight for us. We truly thank Hashem we are here and alive. Everyday a blessing.

My wife’s grandmother, 96, called last week from Florida to ask how we are holding up. Considering at my age she ran through Europe escaping the Nazis I would say we’re doing decently well.

Currently, we have next to zero income. We are living on emergency credit cards. Debts are piling up. We have zero way of paying the mortgage. Health insurance: on hold. Tuition forgets about it (Not to mention our girls can not sit still for a zoom classroom). Every side cost is being canceled. Each day trying to find another cost to cut down on. Many costs are simply being deferred to pay at a later date. I am not sure when that will be. It’s amounting to huge deficits for down the road. Will all these costs be forgiven when things reopen? I doubt very much that to be the case. Its insurmountable debt.

We have filed for the numerous government assistant programs of which none have come through (or we were told we would not qualify). I am not alone. I am the story of every American. I know that. Many far worse then myself. In many homes food on the table is scarce. But I am the story of millions of others like me around the world who can not make ends meet. All to no faulting of our own.

If I was lucky enough to be a citizen in Georgia or Tennesse today, perhaps we would see some hope to start our business. Today those governors said they don’t want to be responsible for people not making mortgage payments. I wonder if Murphy and Cumo have some magical solutions for us down the road so as not to be bothered by that issue.

The above-mentioned states are allowing pretty much for everything to reopen with guidelines of caution. In New York and New Jersey, we are subject to radical shut down extremes. We have no clue when this will end. It didn’t stop New York City parks from being full this Sunday with very questionable social distancing. Yet If I want to do a photoshoot to cover my groceries that type of work is officially prohibited. We are told to stay home. It will be great for you. You will save lives they say. We need to help the amazing health care workers. We are told it will all be ok. You must flatten the curve.

Let’s talk about that curve for a moment. The one that does not break any virus. The curve was and is all about not overwhelming the medical system. This is the very reason why Sweden did not go on full shutdown, as they understood allowing immunity with an initial high death toll is the easiest way to beat this.

Is that the right answer? Its been speculation for the experts. I dont know. I do know the United States is far from the clear with Corona. Even if things reopen it’s with high likelihood a second wave will hit in the fall. It will lead to more shutdowns.

Our bussiness’ are suffering. Majorily.

We did not beat Corona yet. Far from it. All the good news about numbers going down is a poor indication. It means that our healthcare system is not about to collapse. Ok Goodnews.

The current shutdowns allow the country to get corona albeit more spread out and at the cost of possible destruction to our country economically.

But of course, we need to stay home. No matter what. Right? Even if it means we enter a depression worse then 1929? Even if it means countless people could loose everything. Legitimately loose everything. Those numbers stand far worse then the Corona death tolls.

Let us keep dropping stimulus packages, paycheck reliefs, whatever you want to call them. Let’s keep sending them out until we are dry in the federal reserve. Can America really keep spending our way out of this mess? I am not so sure of that.

Again I have yet to see a penny of that money. I’m still waiting. No ten thousand dollar SBA loan to help a struggling small bussiness. No PPP loan. No stimulus check. No unemployment.I know many in our industry have not seen any of these checks. They are long in coming.

Where is all the financial reliefs that have been touted. When they come will they really make a diffrence?

We did not beat Corona yet. Far from it. All the good news about numbers going down is a poor indication. It means that our healthcare system is not about to collapse. Again that’s great news for now.

All the major corporations are getting the bailouts. Airlines to car dealers are seeing the big bucks. The 2 trillion dollar bailout had money for them all. The CEOs are not loosing too much sleep. For them, it’s about their friends in wWashington who will bail them out as needed. It’s the small business of America that will go under.

Its the small time wedding photographer who can not afford to operate in an extended shutdown. WE ARE SUFFERING.

Bottom line we need to find a better way. I am not God and I don’t know the solution. I speak for one industry of workers in the Jewish market but it’s really the voice of citizens all over this country. It is why people are fussing. Unless we all intend to be working full time for Jeff Bezos, we need to break the financial curve. The solution must be better than the problem.

If you know people in the simcha industry reach out and say hello. We are all suffering. Even more if you know a chosson or kallah reach out and give them chizuk they could really use it as well. We all need to be here for eachother. With all the distancing we need to unite in bigger ways then ever before.

Yosef Shidler a native of Denver, Colorado currently resides with his wife Sarah in Tom’s River, NJ. Together they run a well-known photography company, CJ Studios Wedding Photography.

The views expressed here in this post are only of the writer(s), and not of the owners or shareholders of VINnews. This editorial does not represent the company in any way and is only an expression of the writer. 


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121 Comments
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Educated Archy
Educated Archy
3 years ago

Yes this is why we need to reopen as trump says . People say for economic reasons ? No it’s because you will have more cats trophies this way . People will starve . Kids will be malnourished . Sucides will increase and yes covid19 will increase . You can’t overdose on chemo and neither can you on
Social distance . Time to reopen.

5TResident
5TResident
3 years ago

Better to be financially strapped than dead.

get real
get real
3 years ago

First of all my sympathies, I too got laid off and most of my neighbors too, you can get unemployment for self employed, I think that the days of long elaborate wedding with lots of overtime are a thing of the past

The_Truth
The_Truth
3 years ago

This guy should go into the writing business. While it may not be the most lucrative, he seems to ink a lot a lot of Op-Eds in the past year or so.
The Simcha business is always a fine line – on the one hand you have many saying that simchos are over the top and the excess needs to be trimmed; on the other hand you have the simple florist, flute player, photographer etc who make their parnosa from these luxuries, especially the OTT ones. Nowadays almost everyone has a camera on their phone thats with them all the time, and everyone is snapping pics. We could easily do away with the official photographer at simchos, but what about his parnosa? And that for all the other simcha providers that participate for the benefit from the large simchos?

Kopmaidel
Kopmaidel
3 years ago

everyone is suffering now. Most people do not have incomes. Sorry, but you always sound like such a kvetch. Let us keep davening that this passes quick and keep isolating so we can end this pandemic.

Moe
Moe
3 years ago

Totally agree with Ya. But bare in mind. All retailers in our community wait for this season. The dressmakers is not selling dresses either.

All those called community doctors that are making a killing now; are so easily telling us to stay home another few weeks.

Pay The Piper
Pay The Piper
3 years ago

The reason people in your business are not getting stimulus checks is because the simcha industry is purely off the books. I feel no mercy for a singer that takes $3500 just for one night of singing and plays no tax on it. The same for all the orchestra people.

Am I allowed to ask?
Am I allowed to ask?
3 years ago

That video that some PR firm is circulating regarding making only driveway weddings from now on, is not helping the simcha industry at all. How much is that PR firm making off of this AND WHO IS FUNDING IT?!

Bissel Seichel
Bissel Seichel
3 years ago

Of course I feel sympathy for the author. None of his suffering is his fault or his doing.

In the larger picture, this could be a message from shomayim: Our weddings are out of control.

David
David
3 years ago

Im with you that the economy and business has to re-open asap.

Provided that the elderly and medically impaired (Diabetes, Asthma, Obese, heart conditions etc) must still be totally quarinated. Because if someone C”V still has the Virus and gives it to an elderly person, it would not be a Joke !

Yes, most of us and probably over 90% of the NY or Lakewood population and even in the non-Jewish populations of NY and NJ most people have already been thru the Virus and are therefore immunized with anti-bodies etc. And therefore the economy and every day life should go back to normal. Bit we still have to be careful of the more vulnerable in the population.

EST
EST
3 years ago

Times are hard. Galus wasn’t meant to be smooth sailing. We’ve been spoiled these past 75 years since the destruction of 6 million of our people with an abundance of wealth and prosperity in our community. We’ve lived in an illusion of everlasting stability in health and wealth without saving for disastrous situations such as this. The Great Depression can happen again. Nothing is for certain. It never was. Welcome to Galus. Daven for Moshiach and for the tzaar of the Shechinah and for Geula of all of Klal Yisroel. We’re all in this together. We all need a salvation.

Rex
Rex
3 years ago

Your story is heart wrenching. We must continue to pray and help each other out. People are suffering. However Governo Coumo and Murphy are not to blame. They are working hard to prevent deaths and should be lauded for that. Premature opening will cause death and more economic ruin. There are thousands sitting shiva. Living in Tennessee and Georgia is not the answer. Just today Republican Senator Lindsey Graham said he fears that Georgia is reopening too quickly. We do not have tests, we do not have a cure and we do not have a vaccine. This is not the fault of those working to flatten the curve and prevent hospitals from being overwhelmed. The economic damage must be addressed and hopefully the stimulus checks and enhanced unemployment benefits help. Our country needs a strong social safety net but government aid is available to the needy. There are organizations that help guide people through the web of available government resources.

David
David
3 years ago

Your comment is well written and also hard to read because its heart wrenching.

Lakewood as a whole with the huge amount kein yirbu Bnei Torah and one spouse bread-winners is being hit very hard.

I can imagine people are not paying Tuition (will a Din Torah solve this question ?) and the Schools will not have the money to pay Teachers, so this will only exacerbate the situation …

David
David
3 years ago

Mr Shidler, I know this is a little off topic but may I ask this question. If someone gave you a deposit for a Wedding or any function, do you return the deposit in the case of Corona when its the Government and Society that does t allow the Function ? What is the Din Torah ?

Does one have to pay Tuition during this unprecedented crisis? Does one get the money back for Tuition already paid (like by the Israeli Seminaries that make sure all Tuition is paid BEFORE the Seminary year begins) during Corona ?

Boroch
Boroch
3 years ago

While I feel badly for the author of this article, and his loss of income, I’d like to discuss the “Simcha industry” in general. What sense does it make to spend $200,000 on a lavish wedding (or more)? People are malnourished (including our own), and are homeless, and we see overweight individuals fressing at these simchas, as if they never ate (not to mention having one schnops after another). Everybody has their hand in the kitty; not only the caterer, but the band, the florist, the photographers, etc. The same holds true for lavish Bar Mitzvah and Bat Mitzvah celebrations. Enough already of these excessive events.

ah yid
ah yid
3 years ago

There are many different self-employed not only in the simcha industry. The real estate market is down. I know someone who has a clothing store that is closed and is stuck with a store full of merchandise. Therapists can’t do their jobs properly if at all and the children who need the services are sorely missing out. I went to the unemployment website. I was not sure what to do. I have a job that I get a w-2 but my main source of income is my self-employment. I still get paid from “pay check” job but not from my self-employment The site wasn’t helpful how to fill out the application in my situation.

Binyomin Ribiat
Binyomin Ribiat
3 years ago

Mr. Shidler, I hope you read the comments. (I would usually not comment, but feel so bad for you and the others who are going through hard times)
If I may suggest instead of fighting to stay in business with something that may not be so relevant at the moment, perhaps try a different area of photography such as headshots for web sites, products, art. Maybe you can give an online class in the area of photography. We all must adapt rather than fight, this is the key. I pray that you will Be”H be super successful!!!

Real reason
Real reason
3 years ago

To all those who are parroting the apikorsim on Fox news in pushing to open up New York , New Jersey etc before the danger has passed, do you really believe that the Torah allows you to kill people ?

The Torah does not even allow you to commit suicide and שפיכות דמים is יהרג ואל יעבור !!!

Voice of Reason
Voice of Reason
3 years ago

There is something that graces the pages of this site, others, and the many pages of kosher social media. It is painful to read, but is also irritating. It’s called “sob stories”. Of course we must sympathize with the writer. I know quite a lot of people, and almost all of them are experiencing a major hit to their financial lives. There are precious few that are doing well during this pandemic. Yes, the “Simcha Industry” is taking a huge hit. Yes, it’s the livelihood that is now non-existent for many others. What bothers me is that articles like this are there to push an agenda, and that message carries a bit of a negative side. But more on that in a moment.

There are countless pieces that address any of the over abundance of niftarim, making the pleas for the families to be supported. I must say this in caps. NONE OF THE SURVIVING VICTIMS OF THIS TRAGEDY IS ANYTHING LESS THAN A MAJOR TZOROH FOR KLAL YISROEL. I am not making light of the situation, not for any individual, family, not for Klal Yisroel. The message is these sponsored ads, including the ones with noted rabbonim speaking on behalf of the families of the niftarim, is that this case is special. If you have a dollar, it must go to THIS family, because the niftar was this or that, and the family is whatever.

Being one of those who is also suffering, without anyone blasting my situation to the public, I find these pleas painful, which they are, but also offensive. There are many who are suffering, and many other industries besides those geared to simchos are in deep trouble. Yes, there are many who have opened their hearts and checkbooks, and they should be blessed with great hatzlochoh. And the amount of pain is still not quelled by all the extremes of generosity. And our outreach to HKB”H with Torah and Mitzvos, Ahavas Hashem and Yiras Hashem is clearly the most important thing we can do for ourselves.

But we need to get off the pity pot. From just my immediate circle of family, friends, and neighbors, there are many who can write the same op-ed with details changed a little.

Lastly, the issues of health risks and economic risks are at odds with each other. All issues need to be considered. Yes, I give health matters priority. But it would be completely irresponsible to address the matter of opening up the economy without properly weighing all factors.

Amil Zola
Amil Zola
3 years ago

With the current cease in immigration there will be a great many service industry jobs opening. People are still needed to clean hospitals, harvest food, and work in processing plants. Warehouse industry jobs are growing because of more online purchasing, Fed Ex and UPS are hiring. There is work, it may not be a career choice but all work is honorable.

Eli
Eli
3 years ago

If things ever do get back to normal , photographers should not broadcast their wares for the whole world to see. It is a lack in tzenius to broadcast a family wedding for the masses on youtube, even with permission from the family. A food for thought.

Mendy
Mendy
3 years ago

Daven to your Rebbe in Crown Heights. I heard a lot of wondrous stories with those that did.

Castille Creations
Castille Creations
3 years ago

You forgot the florists , but I’ll forgive you for that!

Castille Creations
Castille Creations
3 years ago

I don’t know what the answer is. But if it makes you feel any better, I share in your pain. We have to keep דאווענונג and saying תהילים and helping whoever we can and doing our השתדלות regarding פרנסה , by taking whatever work we can and applying for whatever aid we can, and hashem will take care of the rest and sustain us all.

Gitty
Gitty
3 years ago

Recently heard about something called forbearance, mortgage companies will allow you to pay the next 12 months at the end of the loan. Other types of companies like insurance may have something similar.

Chana1
Chana1
3 years ago

i am so dissapointed Moshiach has not yet come. Imagine all this tremendous upheaval just fades away and we just ‘go back to our regular lives’. But how can Moshiach come if we are still blaming, putting down one another and calling each other names? The least we could do during these AWEsome times is be humbled, do teshuva and be united in our prayers for the geulah.

Jihad
Jihad
3 years ago

First I am very sympathetic that your livelihood is going down the drain I hope you make a good living one way or the next but I must say that the photography industry as wedding has caused so many people Financial pressures it course 3 to $5,000 for a few pictures that everybody feels compelled to have why does a person need those pictures it’s in it’s an industry that created this social pressure. either way may the good Lord help you make a good living

Boro parker
Boro parker
3 years ago

Here is the solution.
Wedding halls should divide their halls into three or four areas for smaller weddings. This way they won’t lose much. One caterer can handle all those few weddings and so too a
photographer.
It may cost a bit more on photographer or music but it’s just because of extra manpower.
Small weddings don’t need so many invites so you can email or call the immediate family guests

Avrum
Avrum
3 years ago

The lock down started in Montreal Quebec the week of Purim actually Friday March 13. It is still in effect.

In Canada the government has been especially generous and so most working people even students are being given 500.00 per week for the a maximum of 16 weeks. Yet even here we have many who whine and bellyache.

The point is you will always have those who whine and bellyache no matter what. This is a Magaifa with many many dying before their time.

Its out of our control and all we can do is hope and pray it goes away. In the interim stay at home and make the best of it till such time the all clear is announced.

One final note…in the good years you save for the bad years..IF you are all the great Torah learners you pretend to be you ought to know that. Good times dont last forever. That is a basic fact of life.

Real reason
Real reason
3 years ago

Even if some meshugene governor, who listens to the apikorsim and reshaim at Fox news and cares more about money than human lives, would allow people to mingle and come into close contact with each other in their state before the danger is over, it still would require a Posek to decide if you can go out and endanger yourself and others al pi torah.

Ari
Ari
3 years ago

You kept your clients good faith deposits? There’s your free community handout.

Real reason
Real reason
3 years ago

You are not expressing the Torah’s view.

Show me one human life that was lost because of the shutdown. Just one.

You can’t seem to differentiate between hardship and death.

It’s mind boggling, since so many posts have told you this חילוק over and over.

Fox has blood on it’s hands again as the game changing drug doesn’t work and Trump and Fox are no longer promoting it.

anynomous
anynomous
3 years ago

Its a very sad situation we are all in. My father & Brother are in the party rental industry and they are in the same boat.

Complaining will not help.

its time to try to search for additions areas where you can diversify so you are not only based on Simchas.

pray for advice and keep your eyes open.

I”ll mention 2 ideas, don’t knwo if its applicable for you but everything is better than sitting at home with no money.

1) business need images of the products to sell online.
2) maybe look into doing google 360 photos of business. it helps business rank on google

yossi
yossi
3 years ago

A friend of mine who was a nice Fardeener with a very good business called me yesterday if i can help him raise money for his sons wedding coming up in a few weeks. I was shocked to hear him begging for help but he told me it took me 3 days to actually push talk on his phone when he dialed me ,he was so embarrassed and shameful to ask for help when he was on the giving side.
I questioned him where is the wedding and what are his expense list.
He told me that he actually was planning a big wedding but he is thankful to hashem that with this corona virus he will have to do it in a local backyard or small shul . He cancelled the 8 man band, 6 singers, photographer, and party planner. No shabbos aufrif kiddush and NO seven days sheva bruches.
All he needs is $22,000 to get him the basics for the Chusen,clothing and some minor furnishing.
The good news is that i was fortunate i called a friend of mine who is b”h well off and after listening to my story he wired in the whole amount into my bank account and he said if you need more just call me.
I really feel the pain of this photographer and the thousands of heimishe people who cater to the simche industry but somehow we need to find a way that those high cost simches should start bringing down their expenses without having the funding for it. Klal Yisroel is struggling and they cant afford to support every other simche but we for sure dont need another epidemic to teach us that we can do away with much less.
May hashem only give us simches and refuahs for the yiddishe world .

Mel from Monsey
Mel from Monsey
3 years ago

Where were these poor caterers when you asked to have a wedding with fewer than 400 people. They disappeared. I have no sympathy for these people now.

yossi
yossi
3 years ago

To Mel from Monsey
There is NO reason to be upset with a caterer who has a 400 people minimum.
Those caterers have a cost basis how they calculate their price of simches and they need to make a profit .
Most caterers are hard working people who have families they never see during chasene season working from 3pm-4 am. While you claim you have NO sympathy for those caterers , how about the cooks, waiters, managers,cleaning crews, those people dont need to feed their family like you do.?
there are plenty smaller halls to accommodate smaller weddings and the bigger halls are catering to families who do need large halls. You should have sympathy for every YID who looses his Parnassah. This is NOT a time to measure sympathy by your feelings its a time for achdus feeling another yids pain loosing his parnassah and all the people working for him.

Dovid
Dovid
3 years ago

  Yossi

I’m sorry to hear about your friend but I’m still scratching my head as to why he even has 22K of wedding expenses when he is making the barest minimum of a wedding because of Coronovirus?